"Some Short Poems I'd Write if I Were in Love Right Now" by Daniel Bailey

1.
if our love were an airplane
we would almost be home by now
we would be pulling into the driveway c
rushing the neighbors’ cars with our love’s aeronautical weight

2.
your love makes me want to die
in the good way
the way that makes us forget
that we are all terminally ill

3.
if i ever get amnesia
and forget your name
and forget your face...
i’m sorry, you can kill me
if you want

4.
i want my soul to eat your soul like plankton
millions of particles a day
let your soul line the inside of my soul
like cave lights so i can see inside myself
and know which parts to close off

5.
if having a baby would make you happy
i’d be ok with that

6.
i don’t know who i am most of the time

7.
i didn’t mean to ever fall in love again

8.
push me out the second story window
and into the bushes below
i’ll look up and laugh
and we’ll spend the night
hugging in the bushes

9.
if i ever say, “i hate you,”
leave me alone
i will love you again in the morning

10.
what do you need more than anything?

11.
i feel like a water balloon thrown against a brick wall

12. a garden hose bleeding rust into the grass

13.
let’s throw police cars into the sun
let all the paint melt off in space
and the lights fall back to us, screaming

14.
this time i hope i’m not the one who cares more
but, i will always care as much as i can

Thoughts on these snippets when reading them for the first time was 'this is quite delightful' and 'vaguely accurate'. I feel like Bailey has established some form of identification with his readers, his thorough precision in these 14 short verses hits the bullseye with a point 10. Quite often it is the mundane and insignificant that are overlooked and taken for granted, yet they bring joy and mask negativities.

Reading this somehow comforts me like a spiced pumpkin latte candle would. The kind of warmth that eases the fearful mind. One thing I have been thinking about is being afraid and not wanting to be afraid any longer. I am unafraid of people seeing through me. I am only afraid they don't.

It has gotten to a point where I feel indifferent and only feel like academic validation is a good justification of what I am doing to myself. I put aside all this loneliness and pretend I am okay. Because that's what everyone seems to be good at.