Ensconce

Sunday afternoon, first sighted: I seek comfort in scrolling through my tumblr and browsing through past photos I've reblogged. The absence of any being on my posts is seemingly reflective of the human isolation I've embedded into my life. Or maybe not. It's like how parallel lines have a lot in common but never meet. A year and a half of being alone has shown me the versatility of life. It is not that I do not like my company at school, I do. But it's different. They're different. We all are. Let's take this head on: we behave based on guiding values of courtesy and politeness. We are selfish and only find ways to satisfy our social instincts as humans. I used to thread on this lingering sense of unease when I was alone. I thought it wasn't okay being solitary. But I've come to realize that it is when you pull back and withdraw that you truly feel yourself and penetrate deep into your being. There will be many more moments of ephipany whether you like it or not.

We live in approximations and fragments. To lock us in, like a clock with no hands. I have no purpose, but time will still pass by even if I'm not there to mark it. I am sick of conversations that have been built on crafted sentences and contrived replies. I am sick of trying to make small talk. My head is in constant ferment as I wrangle a topic on common platform. Why do we try so hard?

I think the base of my posts are very much repetitive. But it's the only thing I feel, or am close to feeling now.
It's 4PM and I shall get on with my run now.

On a lighter note, my iBanking token arrived last week, hurray!